Happy 2nd Birthday Pierce!

Pman you are 2 years old!! WOO HOO!! You made it and what a journey it has been. I just want you to know I adore you and your little personality. I cannot wait to see what the future holds. thank you for being such a little joy, for loving your family, for loving your church and most of all for being you! I love you Pierce. Can't wait for many more years to come with you!!!

Christmas and Sickies!

Lets start a few days before Christmas. Poor Hayden was having trouble breathing and many nights of no sleep with lots of coughing. I took him to the Dr. and he was diagnosed with Croup. Hayden they put you on prednisone. We go home and the next day your a little better but two days after going to the Dr. I notice that you seem to be worse. You are now suddenly weezing and seem to be unable to catch your breath. I call the Dr and they have me bring you in immediatly. They take your oxygen level and you are at only 90% which is not good for a little guy. They give you a breathing treatment in the office and take your levels again and praise God you are back up to 98%. So it is determined that you will need the breathing treatments 3 times a day with a slow taper off. Finally you are on the mend.

The day after we get Hayden all fixed up Pierce is coughing crazy. Pierce you had been coughing for about 2 months but suddenly you seem severly worse. Your coughing makes you gag because of the junk coming up you are now running a 103 fever and higher. WE are at your mimi Bells and we make the decision that you need to go to Nite LIfe Pediatric which is an emergency walkin clinic for children. i take you in and they run their tests and you come back with RSV, influenza A and Influenza B, and you having walking pnemonia. No wonder you feel so horrible. I feel terrible for you. You are now on antibiotics and tami flu. The Dr. at the office also determines that Hayden likely has RSV and not croup. WE get home and you are just a mess. I finally get you to bed and not even a few hours later you are moaning and crying calling for me. I go in there and you are just so uncomfortable and in so much pain that you wanted to lay in bed with me. I was literally up with you till 3:30 am and I finally was able to put you back to your bed. I go to bed by 4:00 am and am up at 6:30 with your brother. It was a terrible night. This was one of many nights that I had had terrible between you and your brother. I always seems all the sickies come on when Daddy is gone and mommy winds up dealing with everything alone. its hard but I do it because I love you both so much.

Finally two days after all the fiasco it is CHRISTMAS DAY! MOmmy is still very tired because she hadn't got much sleep but I am up early with breakfast in the oven and with you boys up and dressed waiting for Mimi and Poppa Bell to come over. Daddy and I decide to exchange gifts. I got Daddy a robe and pj pants. And he totally swept me off my feet he got mommy razors, VS underware, VS perfume and a BEAUTIFUL Sterling silver braclet with a charm that had both Hayden and Pierce on it. It was beautiful an dmommy was sooo suprised that Daddy could be so sweet. So finally Mimi and Poppa come and we open gifts. It was so much fun. Pierce you just wanted to open every ones gifts. You were so happy and had so much fun. We played and opened gifts ate breakfast and just enjoyed company.

After breakfast and gifts we went to your mimi and poppa fullers house. We opened gifts there and had a great time. We than went to aunt terrys and dales. Pierce and Hayden you guys were both wonderful. you both enjoyed christmas so much. Hayden you love the gifts you love the music and the lights. Pierce is so funny because anytime you play with any toys whether they are yours or his you come up and try and take it from Hayden and say "my turn". you are so sweet. Both of you boys are just such blessings from God and I am so thankful that we are where we are today. Thank you boys for making me a mommy. Pierce your birthday is tomorrow how exciting!

Of course today Pierce I must add you did your first puke! You were acting crazy and had drank a bunch of water and all of a sudden puke. Lovely. Hey of course Daddy is at work so I clean up we cuddle and off to bed. I love you boys thank you thank you thank you for loving me too!!!

Pierce your 2nd Birthday!

I can't believe I haven't written about your 2nd birthday party considering we celebrated it on November 27th! I guess time gets away when you have family and kids and a busy life surrounding you. WEll where to get started. It looked as though it was going to be a very gloomy day but we were (daddy and I) determined to make this your best 2nd birthday ever. I had been preparing for this day for weeks and the last part to do on this day was put it all together!!!

Daddy got home from work that morning and decdied that his boy needed ballons for his birthday and that we needed more food. So off we went we got about 20 ballons half filled with helium and I got more food and home we came to start assembling. The morning started early but it still didn't seem like enough time. We fed you lunch and sent you to bed and Daddy and I were off like mad men!

Up went your bounce house first, than the ballons got tied to tables chairs and trees, fishing polls went out back by the fence, cupcakes were baked, a cake was frosted, cupcakes were frosted and sprinkled, food prepared, decorations set out, baths taken, a baby fed, clothes bough because Lord knows you didn't have a nice outfit to wear for your birthday and before we knew it it was almost 3:00 pm and the party was about to start.

You woke up in a pretty bad mood but started changing shortly after I gave you a cookie. Its amazing what a cookie will do for a grumpy little boy. Than your Daddy opened the blinds in the back and you got to see the party scene. you were blown away. The look in your eyes said it all!! Your first guest to arrive was Kella with her mom Kelley and Josh. You got hugs and you guys were the first to jump on the bounce house what a ball you had.

Some of your guests were: Gracie, Christina, Matt, Nanny Dyal, Aunt Jackie, Nathan, your grandmas and grandpas, great grandma wheeler, aunt terry, Brenda, Ramon, Rachel, Daniel his mom and Shayla, Kerriann, ethan, Xavier and Zach!
Your party was wonderful.


All the adults set out side while you kids jumped, ran, played on the play house, played with the sand, ate and just really had a ball. Your Daddy grilled hot dogs and hamburgers it was delicious. We also had bbq beans, coleslaw, chips, fruit salad, cheese and crackers! After we ate around 5 things quited down and we all came in side as the sun was setting. We sat you p and sang happy birthday to you! You loved it and requested for us to sing it again... so of course we did!!!! After happy birthday cake and icecream eating and cupcake eating we opened gifts.

You got so many wonderful things you are just such a special little boy. All these people came because they love you and you have affected them in ways you coul dnever imagine. That day will go down as one of the most fabulous days from your beautiful smile to your high jumping to you excited gift opening. You really are a special boy and I am so thankful to be your mommy! This day was wonderful and seeing your happy smile and your beautiful face I knew all the hard work, money and time that was put into your 2nd birthday was totally worth it! You are the light of our lives! We love you little boy! Your mommy and Daddy!

Hayden my 4 month love!

Hayden my love you are 4 months old today. Boy are you such a joy. I am so thankful to be your mommy and I can't wait to see how much you are going to change in this life time. You are so funny and you still have the coolest hair. you are a wonderful nurser and a great night sleeper. Hayden your brother adores you. I now put you in the walker and Pierce will push you all over the house as fast as he can you just sit there and love it. You also adore your Daddy when he is home you just find him and smile and smile and smile. You are so sweet. One of the funniest things you do is at night when I am getting you ready for bed you get really excited and smiley. You laugh and squeel... its only right before bed. I just laugh and laugh. Hayden I could never ask for anything better than for you. You are amazing you are my love. You are our special little gift from God and I am so thankful. Thank you for being my littlest I love you Hayden!

Thanksgiving and 23 months!

Hayden yesterday was your first thanksgiving and Pierce yesterday was your second thanksgiving! It was wonderful with both of you! Things are so different now that we have two boys but it was wonderful. We went to Nanny and Poppy Dyals for the first part and had a big lunch. It was lots of fun all your great aunts and uncles just love both you boys! You also love your cousins so much Nathan and Jared. Nathan has givin you his four wheeler Pierce and you love it so much! You are a great driver of it and you also are a super sports star! Hayden you were happy as a lark as long as your belly was full and you were getting tons of attention. You are very needy but thats ok!

After the Dyals we went to Aunt Terry's and Uncle Dales to meet up with Daddys side of the family! We played outside and left shortly after to go to your grandma Fuller's house. You love your cousins Ethan, Xavier and Zach! you are so funny little boy! You just love to play play play! Hayden they call you angry baby and thats because everytime you are in your carseat you scream. Its NON STOP!! Its a little crazy but I guess we will keep yoU! :-). j/k we adore you Hayden!

Pierce tomorrow we are celebrating your 2 year birthday even though you are going to be only 23 months! We want you to have a special day just for you there is no competeing with Jesus's birthday don't you know! It is at our house so I have been busy planning cleaning and everything in between! We are so excited to celebrate this special day with you! You are a big brother our first born and the love of our lives! I love you Pierce and I love you Hayden! You both are amazing and I am so thankful for you guys!! Can't wait to spend the next 80 years with you boys!

Love your mama!

Life Changes

My life has changed drastically over the last few days. My hubby decided I should no longer work the part time that I am because I need to be home to care for the kids. This has been so hard for me. I only worked 2 half days a week but it was my time to get away, to dress up, to have adult interaction, to run the few errands I needed to on my way home and it provided mine and the littles insurance. So not working has been a major change... Its been hard. Its been an adjustment just the realization that now we really will have to count our pennies, that I won't get the breaks that I need/want and that we will now have to pay out of pocket for insurance.

So now that we are paying out of pocket for insurance I no longer have maternity insurance. I think the finality that right now and no where in the future do we see having any more children even a possiblity is very hard for me. Its sad. It makes me want to cry but I know thats just the way it has to be.

So I was thinking as I was gazing at my sweet little boys laying in bed. That had Hayden not come when he did (aka not planned) that he may never be here and no other children may ever be here. When I was five months pregnant My sales job had been sold so we got an enourmous pay cut, than my hubby asked me to not work, and now we don't have maternity insurance and could have never afforded it to even have another child. So what I am saying is that God knew that Hayden needed to come when he did or he would have never been part of this family. I love this little boy so much. I think it makes me so thankful because in the beginning I had so much guilt about having him about stealing Pierces childhood away b/c I was having another baby so close to his age. I felt guilty also because I felt I didn't deserve to have a healthy baby when on the same exact day that I found out that I was having a healthy perfect little baby my brother and sister in law were finding out that their precious baby girl had passed away in her womb from horrible chromosonal disorders at 20 weeks. I felt guilt more than I could ever express. I felt that I could not possibly love another child as much as I love Pierce. I just didn't think I could do it. I had these feelings up until even a few weeks after he was born. I dealt with some PPD and had such a hard time bonding with him. I loved Hayden but I wasn't "in love" with him like I was instantly with Pierce. But than the fog lifted my head cleared and I fell in love with this beautiful, harry headed little boy and I could not feel more blessed. I can't believe that if it had been MY choice I would not have had another child yet which would have possibly mean't I may have never had any more at all. Thank you Jesus for knowing more than I know. Thank you for knowing the future and knowing how our lives and financial stability would change. Thank you for knowing that I WOULD love Hayden more than I could ever imagine and that everytime I look at that huge gummy smile I just want to eat him up.

My life is beautiful it may not have gone exactly how I would have planned but it is beautiful and its my new life. Its a life where I am home with my kids where I am available not only to my kids but to my husband. I just pray that I can be an even better mom that I will find the outlets that I need to have adult interaction and that during the day when I want to rush around and need to get things done that I will STOP... hug my kids a little closer, go a little slower and just soak up EVERY single precious moment that I have with these boys. Before I know it they will be big strong tall boys who will be able to bear hug and lift their mommy off the ground. But until than I want to be the one to do the lifting, the tear wiping, the hugging the kissing, the praying and that thanking. For I am blessed. Blessed more than my wildest dreams and imaginations....

Little 3 month old monster!

Oh my little Hayden. You are now three months old today. You are such a joy. I never knew I could love another little boy as much as I do. You are such a little sweetie. You smile constantly. You tried you first bite of baby oatmeal on October 31 and you also did your first giggle. Your giggles are few and far between but when you do them they are beautiful. For your first holiday Halloween you and your brother dressed up as Chickens! IT was adorable.

Hayden I adore you your little personality has started to shine. You really love to be held constantly. You are a fantastic nurser! You are a wonderful night time sleeper. You aren't such a great napper but thats ok atleast you sleep through the night. It makes it quite difficult to get things done during the day when you need me to hold you all the time but I know I need to enjoy these moment because before I know it you won't want me at all to hold you.

Your brother has come to really adore you. I now but you in the highchair when we are in the kitchen and your brother pulls you close to him and tells you he loves you over and over. It melts my heart. I hope you and your brother will be best friends. He can always make you smile and I can't wait till you guys can play together. Well little boy we adore an dlove you and can't wait for many more firsts that will come with you. Oh you also set up by yourself for a few seconds on October 31. Apparently that was a big day for you~!

We love you Hayden Jackson!!! Thank you for being our second born we are soooo blessed.